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Youngsters to be Proud Of > Grandparents In the Home
Grandparents In the Home
Manville & Rosa-Maye's Grandparents |
John & Eula Become Grandparents
A typical family might consist of
parents, one grandparent, an adolescent boy or girl, and one or more young children.
What can be done to make each member of this group feel at home under his own roof?
... The wants of the grandparents are usually few. A simple but a quiet and a
cheerful room - this is usually their chief concern.
Margaret Fleming,
Better Homes & Gardens, 1930
Until
the middle years of the 20th Century, most households included a grandparent or two.
Not only did adult children feel obligated to care for their parents (as their parents
had cared for them), their elders were often viewed as fonts of parental wisdom. As
the New York Times noted in 1886,
There is nobody like a
comparatively young and lively grandsire or grandmother to fill in the family
chinks. … Childhood is infinitely more tender in [their] sight than it is to father
or mother, and what are deliberate wanderings out of the way in their eyes are but
involuntary slips of the untried feet to grandmother. … Ah , how much grandmother
knows!
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Manville & Rosa-Maye's Grandparents |
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Grandparents
had experience raising children and sometimes related to their grandchildren better than
the parents themselves – as John Kendrick noted in 1901, when Rosa-Maye stayed with her
grandparents, Charles and Ida Wulfjen:
Rosa-Maye
is growing more tractable and easily managed all the time. The truth of the matter is that
her grandparents can just beat the sox off her parents in managing her. … Your father says
they have quite decided to take either Rosa-Maye or Manville for good when we return home!
Following
Rosa-Maye’s birth, Ida wrote to Eula and John about her husband’s reaction – and her own –
at being unable to be with their daughter and granddaughter:
Your
father was so happy – and did not mind being called an old grandfather at all. He said he
would have to get a cane as soon as he could … Son, I shall watch very eagerly for your
letters to learn how daughter is getting along. No one but a mother can ever know what a
sacrifice it is to stay away from a daughter at such a time.
Manville and
Rosa-Maye Kendrick never knew their paternal grandparents. John Kendrick's father, John
Harvey Kendrick, had drowned in 1860 and his mother, Anna Maye, died in 1863. In
1917, while on a sea voyage to France, John Kendrick told his son a little about young
Anna:
On the
way over I have been reminded many times by the surrounding circumstances of my Irish
mother's trip across this old, old ocean in a sail ship a little more than 60 years ago
when she was about the age your sister is now. She had a sister with her and they were
going among strangers in quest of home and fortune. Don't you think she was a brave girl
that grandmother of yours and are you not glad she had the courage to go out to America? I
surely am.
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John & Eula Become Grandparents |
As far
back as 1900, John Kendrick knew the value of grandparents and what made them so
special:
It is my opinion that the better one understands and
appreciates children the more patient and thoughtful they are of them. It is no
doubt this principle that makes grandparents so much more indulgent than they were
with their own.
John and Eula Kendrick’s four
grandchildren were born between 1931 and 1934. While John did not live long enough to meet
the youngest, Hugh and Kendrick, the two oldest, Eula and John, quickly enraptured him.
Shortly after young John’s birth, the elder Kendrick wrote to Manville:
I feel reasonably certain at this time
that he is to be a boy after my own heart just as little Eula is a girl after the hearts
of both her grandmother and grandfather.
Because
his son had made the decision to stay out of politics and public life, John Kendrick
hoped that his grandson might take up the mantle of public service. He stated his
case in a 1932 letter to Manville:
Here I am reminded to say that your reference to the sober
attitude of John does not disturb me in the least. On the contrary, I am pleased
that he is a sober minded boy. It is quite all right for girls to be laughing and
giggling at every little thing, but boys have more serious things to think about.
If this boy grows to maturity of body and mind it is easy for his Grandfather to
conceive that perhaps his State, and maybe his Nation, will make demands of
service upon him. In any event it is just as well for him to begin by taking life
seriously, because it certainly will be a serious situation for him if he is ever
called for public service.
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